


To You My Children

by axayashinoceres



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Alternate Universe - Reincarnation, F/M, Female Eren Yeager, Oneshot, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-05-15
Updated: 2014-05-15
Packaged: 2018-01-24 22:08:51
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Major Character Death, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,251
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1618733
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/axayashinoceres/pseuds/axayashinoceres
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>To you, my wife, I give you your wish.</p>
<p>And to you, my children, I wish you happiness.</p>
<p>Regret is a pain. Death is absolute. Back then, if only I granted your wish... our wish... It would have been a sweet pain to have held that wish in our arms. I made you wait so long. Sorry about that, Eren. Sorry...</p>
<p>Sorry, Erin.</p>
            </blockquote>





	To You My Children

**Author's Note:**

> Oneshot for a debut! Thank you, AO3. This thing wouldn't leave my head until I had it out. I hope you enjoy it!
> 
> Axa, at your service!

**To You My Children**

 

_To you, my wife…_

 

Bright flash of light and then a brief sense of pain before numbness kicked in. There is that incessant buzz inside his head that was slowly driving him insane if it wouldn't quiet down. Then it suddenly did. Suddenly all he could hear was the ebb and flow of the water, like that moment when you submerge yourself in the sea and just float with the gentle currents.

 

Someone was calling to him. But the words are muffled underwater. All you could hear clearly were the bubbly sounds you make when expelling your breath bit by bit. _Who is it?_ he wonders, eyes he didn't realize he closed, felt heavy when he tried to open them and find out.

 

_-vi…_

_-evi….._

_LEVI!!!_

 

The anguished cry brought him out of his stupor and he suddenly found himself looking up to his wife’s crying face. Even in tears, she is still beautiful. But why would she be crying down at him? There was something he was supposed to remember but he can’t seem to think. When he saw his wife’s tremulous smile, he sucked in a breath and all at once he remembered.

 

Today. He was supposed to meet her at the cafe today before going off to celebrate their anniversary. Hanji had picked up the kids for a two-day stay. His wife went off to get prettied-up, not like she needed it. And he was supposed to leave work early to meet up with her in the cafe.

 

Only…. Only work got in the way, he remembered. He was delayed for thirty minutes and he had to rush through traffic and crowded pedestrians. And then he saw her, his wife, sitting in the outdoor cafe. She had spotted him at the same time he did, and there was a ready smile on her lips. Everything went a bit slow then, though he attributed that to seeing his beloved wife.

 

And then there was that brief flash of brightness. He saw the moment her smile froze and then turned into horror.

 

_Ahhh… I might have gotten into an accident. Probably… If only I met her earlier…_

 

After that, everything just turned dark. The blessed silence was like a balm. Even for just a little while, he wants to forget reality. Just a bit.

 

_Corporal Levi!_

_Corporal Levi, Sir!_

_Corporal…?_

_Sir?_

 

“Corporal Levi?” a timid voice called out to him. For a moment he was disoriented, seemingly unable to tell, let alone remember what reality was. When he finally got his bearings, he noticed that he had yet to acknowledge his caller.

 

“...What is it?” he asked upon seeing Eren’s worried face.

 

“Ah!” she smiled brightly all of a sudden and it made him feel like snatching her up and lock themselves in his bedroom for the rest of the day.

 

“I just came to fetch you. Lunch is being served right now. The others are already there. And…” here she looked a bit uncomfortable.

 

“And?” he prompted, quirking a brow at her.

 

“Ah, well. Squad Leader Hanji is here.”

 

“Huh. We better go. We still have a lot to prepare for.”

 

“Yes, sir!” she straightened up and went ahead.

 

“And Eren,” he called out, causing her to turn her head to look at him. He took that opportunity to pull her into his arms and gave her a brief brush of lips. It was only that, but it was enough to make her glow cherry red and speechless.

“For my appetizer,” he murmured with a straight face as he left her to scramble after him.

 

“Corporal!” she cried accusingly. A smirk slid on his face, unseen by Eren.

 

That night, after an intense bout of lovemaking, the lovers cuddled under the covers while they allow their body to cool down. Eren was tracing his chest languidly. A thought suddenly came to him that she had something she wanted to say and just wasn’t sure how to phrase it.

 

“....Eren?” he prompted her. She sighed and looked up at him, her eyes glimmering a warm gold under the candlelight.

 

“Corporal Levi…”

 

“Levi.”

 

“Eh?”

 

“Just Levi, Eren..” he clarified though no matter how many times he repeated it, she couldn't seem to shake the habit of calling his rank.

 

“Levi,” she began. “I…. I-I…” she promptly turned red and just blurted out ‘I-want-to-have-your-child’ as if saying it faster would make it difficult for me to understand, thereby giving her a chance to say differently.

 

“...What brought this on?” Levi asked as it seemed that she had been thinking about it for awhile now.

 

She shook her head and snuggled closer. “I know that under our current circumstances and us being who we are that it really isn’t advisable to have kids. Besides which, we aren’t even husband and wife. And I know very well about the great gap in our ages and experiences but….”

 

_Great….great age gap? She wants to marry me?_

_….Kids…._

_...Mine and Eren’s…._

_Our….kids?_

 

“Eren, are you with child?” he suddenly interrupted her.

 

“Uh, no. But Levi, I want to be. It might not be...practical at the moment. Because we might die at any moment though, that’s why I at least want to leave behind a legacy born from our love.”

 

She was right. It would be impractical to have children now, even if they were married. But being who she is, there is no way that the Military Police, or even Erwin, could allow her time away to bear us a child and raise it to an age when she could leave it in someone’s care while on missions.

 

But I agree with the desire to have living proof of our love, though I never thought I would be one of the few percentage of soldiers who would find their perfect partner in love and life. However, there are things that ring distastefully in my ears.

 

“Eren, you are implying that we would die before seeing through humanity’s freedom? Are you so sure that we would never see for ourselves the day when titans are completely destroyed? Could you not wait for that time to bring our child into a world when titans no longer roam? Are you that discouraged, Eren?”

 

He could see that he was making her cry. But he could not allow such negative thinking cloud her thoughts. “I don’t want to leave our child an orphan, should we die in battle,” he told her softly. “I also do not want you to feel even the least bit doubt. Do you remember your words that day in the dungeon?”

 

“It was the day I fell for you a little. I didn't’ know it at the time, of course. You were mostly just a weapon we could use to save humanity. But it was also the day I felt in my heart that our salvation was near.”

 

Eren was looking guiltily at him, her tears already flowing in a steady stream though she is doing her very best to staunch them.

 

_“I also want to have children with you, Eren. That’s why I’ll wait for the day we win so that we can bring up our child in a free world.”_

 

I said those words and I meant them wholeheartedly. I fully believed that day would come. How foolish of me. I should have known better. Humans will be free from titans someday. I still firmly hold that belief in my heart which I offer up for humanity. The very same heart that Eren owns as much as I own hers.

 

There was always that possibility that though humans will one day be freed but that we wouldn't live to see it. I was too blinded by chance, by opportunity, that I missed out on the most important opportunity of all - to have Eren as my wife and raise our children together.

 

“EREN!”

 

_I love you. I want you to be my wife. I want to see our child grow. I wish I could have given you that._

 

_“LEVI!!!!”_

 

…. “Levi…” someone cried beside him, softly, as if she was afraid to wake him. He wanted to open his eyes and realized with a start that they were open. The bright light overhead prevented him from seeing anything though the noise started to filter in, increasing in volume each second.

 

The constant beeps and hospital personnel shouting and relaying orders broke through his disorientation. So he was in the hospital after getting into an accident. _Car crash_ his mind supplied for him.

 

“He has stabilized now. Congratulations, Mrs. Ackerman, your husband has awaken, though we could have done without the sudden spike of his heart rate.”

 

After some routine check-ups, he was pronounced healthy and on the road to recovery. Erin was beside herself. Always, whenever their eyes met, she would have tears in her eyes. Really, it was beautiful, but he wished she would give him that carefree smile of hers like she used to.

 

From her, he got the facts of his accident. On the evening of their anniversary, a car malfunctioned and careened into him just as he crossed the street. He wasn't the only casualty, however, he was the most critically injured of them. He was in a coma for a week so his limbs were only slightly weak.

On the day that he woke from his coma, his heart had apparently sped up for some apparent reason. But according to his doctor, whatever the reason may be, it caused him to wake from his deep sleep. Somehow he felt like he had a significant dream. In his dream something profound and tragic happened that caused his awakening. He told Erin this, though he couldn't remember what the dream was about. She believed him and was thankful for it.

 

What he didn't tell her was that he had a revelation that day and no matter how many days have passed, the desire kindled by that revelation burned ever hotter. It finally came to a point when he could no longer keep silent, so he made plans.

 

His superior and friend, Erwin Smith, had forced him to take a one-year vacation. He was resentful for it in the beginning but now he couldn't believe how lucky he is. A month has passed and he was fully healed. His wife began giving him those wide, lovely smiles of hers. He was glad to be spending plenty of time with his children. All was peaceful, save for his one desire.

 

It was going to take him the whole year of vacation period. It was a good thing he could plenty afford it. Now if only things would go according to plan…

 

They were supposed to have a quiet, candlelight dinner in their home in the countryside where they were currently vacationing. The dinner was to make up for their missed anniversary celebration. Hanji had already taken the kids off their hands for the night. The plan was set in motion.

 

But sadly, things  _didn't_  go according to plan. He had forgotten that that was to be expected around Erin Jaeger Ackerman.

 

“Erin, let’s get you pregnant,” he blurted out in a show of uncharacteristic nervousness. It took his wife by surprise, and surprisingly enough, she became the calm, collected one that night.

 

“What brought this on?” she asked lightly, with a smile. All that ran in his head was ‘shit, shit, shit’. He hadn't cursed like this, even inside his head, since Petra gave birth to their first born. Thinking about his first, deceased wife returned him to the current conversation.

 

“Erin, my children are your children, and I know how much you love them like your own. That’s why I want to give us the chance to raise our own child, born from you and I,” he explained hastily, still behaving uncharacteristically.

 

“Oh, Levi… I would love that, to feel our child grow in my womb, to give our children a younger brother or sister to dote on and protect and bully lovingly,” she laughed breathlessly. “But…”

 

“No buts,” Levi stated firmly after silencing her with a brush of lips on trembling lips. “I want to have this with you. I’ve thought so, ever since that day my heart woke me. Later I realized how mortal I am and that one day out of the blue I would leave you without even leaving a piece of me behind.”

 

“Your children with Petra…”

 

“No. I would rather it be of us both. I feel somehow that I am making things right, like fulfilling a promise from long ago.”

 

Erin laughed tearfully, joy so profound. “I never thought this day would come. I was already content because of the children. You have made me realize how much regret I would have if I pass up this chance.”

 

Her words sent a tingle up his spine, somehow finding them familiar. “I would be more than happy to bear your children, Levi. Oh, Gods, how I love you.”

 

“I love you,” he replied, folding her into his arms.

 

_And never again will I let fate tear us from our wishes. Never again._ A voice like his own echoed before fading into the background. Getting your wife pregnant takes some serious work, after all.

 

_And to you, my children, I wish for your happiness. And allow not regret to come into your life. So I wish as well for your children, and your children’s children. This is a promise made eternal._

**END**

 

 

**Author's Note:**

> Hi there, good readers! I hope you liked my debut fanfic on AO3. This story kind of hit me and stuck like glue until I HAD to make an AO3 account to share this with all of you. As it is a oneshot, I glossed over details and made it mostly vague... However, if you need any clarifications, please do contact me!
> 
> Hopefully this story will give me the boost I need to continue some fanfic projects I left on-hold in fanfiction.com
> 
> I'll probably repost most of my stories from there to here. Greetings to my RL little sister, KATastrofic222!
> 
> Now that that's out of the way, I wonder what you managed to understand from this oneshot of mine... ^_^
> 
> Lemme hear from ya!


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